Day 8 – Shhhhh…

Well, I certainly would have written a very different post half an hour ago. One on hope, risk, reason, fear, yadda yadda. A thousand thoughts roiling in my head.

Not now. Now I remember why I sit: Shhhhh… everything’s quiet, none of that seems an issue or a problem right now.

Thanks to a friend’s efforts to talk me down from the crazy tree yesterday I now have:


…stuck to my livingroom wall in big blue marker. And right now, this moment, is just quiet. Nothing I have to do, and any kind of thinking will just stir up all those thousand thoughts again, so I’m not going there right now.

Relax I will sometime, it is a juicy topic to explore, but right now it would just rile my little mental monkey.

So, Shhhhh… remember the moment.

That’s all.

7 thoughts on “Day 8 – Shhhhh…

  1. Remember the moment – for me, part of a bigger battle to just go with the flow and just let go. Not easy for a self-professed control-freak.

    I read a great little piece of ‘village wisdom’ – not totally about remember the moment, but part of the greater theme of live now.

    It said “in (insert tropical place here), the villagers used to trap monkeys by cutting a small hole in a coconut attached to a tree and putting a sweet inside it. The hole was just big enough for the monkey to slide his hand into. The monkey, being attracted to the sweet, would come, stick his hand inside the coconut and then realize that the hole wasn’t big enough for his sweet-filled fist to come out. He could stand there and be frustrated (and ultimately trapped) or just let go.



    1. “He could stand there and be frustrated (and ultimately trapped) or just let go. “

      This is absolutely GOLDEN!!!

      That’s the crux of it exactly!


  2. Glad you liked the village wisdom. I keep repeating it to myself.

    I seem to be on a roll for finding quotes and anecdotes that I like: here’s one from Danish philosopher Kierkegaard who wrote to a friend in 1835, “What I really lack is to be clear in my mind what I am to do, not what I am to know…. The thing is to understand myself…. to find a truth which is true for me.”


  3. Gee, not what I expected to write about –

    So shh…

    Here I’m at a typically got a life moment. Got off work early due to hack*sniffle*snork, went walking, specialty shopping, cooking, listening to music, eating and walking with a friend. What do I need anti-stuckness for? But I think it’s as important to reflect on these days as it is during hard days. Today gives a valid perspective which I’d miss if I only looked for strength in myself when I’m down. Even if it seems obvious today.

    Many ideas about summer travels, more cooking, ways to start nice interactions with various specific people, and other chunks of my life. I’m also thinking, “Is it really so hard to cook when I’m down?” But I often have such disbelieving thoughts and they don’t seem to help. So – “Well, it’s pretty hard.”

    Yes, all the things I fear might come to pass if I go out and try to meet queer women. Might. I don’t know how to do so without an emotional rollercoaster, which might make me puke on my hard-won, demanding employment and other daily self-sufficiency. Is that all? (Shh… go outweighs not go.)


  4. Thoughts spinning out of control
    An insight that thoughts inevitably arise…
    Like a freight train that won´t stop
    The thought of slowing them down feels like a compromise

    I need to direct them towards expression
    And also counter-act the negativity that seems to attach to them as they bubble up
    I recite a mantra …attach a positive entity to my thoughts as they arise
    Holy fuck!!! This works so much better than I expected!!!

    Later I write and write and write and write
    And draw a little
    Peace reigns …finally!
    I sleep like a baby

    This morning I wake up foul
    Om Mani Padme Hum…
    A crack opens, light trickles in
    Could this be the foothold I´m looking for?


  5. In response to you using a blue marker to write on your wall:

    Green, Gold, Purple, Teal
    Copper, Blue, Silver, and Pink
    Sparkle Marker Bliss


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