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ToV 22 – Paradoxical Dating

This chapter opens with a series of lines under what I’d call the category of: f*ing let it go.

If you want to become straight,
let yourself be crooked.
If you want to become full,
let yourself be empty.

And a goodly handful of phrases like that, every one of them a mantra of: stop arguing with reality stop arguing with reality. I love the second part of these lines: let yourself…. If you want something, and here’s the paradoxical part, you have to let go and let yourself be the thing you fear first. It isn’t the pursuit of the thing that gets you what you need, it’s in the letting go of whatever you’re fighting against.

The very last line of this chapter hit me hard, and was what I took with me into my mediation this morning.Read More »ToV 22 – Paradoxical Dating

Haunting Parallel Between Web Development and Dating

So, as per my last post, I recklessly and courageously dove into the back end of my website – after carefully backing everything up and then doing a bunch of updates. Several hours later, my one noticeable change to the look of my website was losing the custom favicon I’d already worked really hard to figure out how to install [insert stream of profanity here].Read More »Haunting Parallel Between Web Development and Dating

Day 90 – whatever happened to the pitching of woo?

My friend has just gotten started on internet dating. So far she’s gotten way more hits than she expected (YAY!), but the emails she’s been getting are clearly indicative of the fact men have forgotten how to pitch woo (Boo…).

Now, the pitching of woo is a different thing from the hurling of sheep or whatever it is they do on facebook these days. Woo (our deep late night patio discourse has determined) is something beyond dating, it actually precedes dating, it is the taking the effort to get to know a girl, convince her of your honourable intentions, sell her on the idea of dating before you even date.Read More »Day 90 – whatever happened to the pitching of woo?

Day 89 – Smart Girls, Pretty Girls

Brian ducks down to get through the small door, steps into the court. Mike is already warming up, lazily bouncing the ball off various walls.

“Hey, how’d the date go?”

“Alright… I guess.”

“Yeah. What’d you do?” Mike lines up to serve, really launches it.

Brian dives for the corner, sneakers squeaking, thwacks it high in return. It bounces off the back wall. “Point. …coffee.”

“Dude! Coffee? That’ll kill ya right from the start.”Read More »Day 89 – Smart Girls, Pretty Girls