To sum up my Right Now, right now, the short answer is:
I can’t even…
The last two years have been an unprecedented, unrelenting disaster which has taught me my strength, my weakness, and just how far you can carry on, long after you have broken.
Everything else in my life has stopped while I go through this “learning experience” (cue my friend Christopher’s line: Oh God, not another learning experience!). I am started to come through on the other side of it, but have a lot of putting together to do, and a lot of processing. This has definitely impacted my writing, not just in limiting the spare time/brain juice to sit down and write, but any kind of meaningful output is hard as I am still reeling and my frontal lobes can’t come up with much more than WTF?
So, as I step back in to this realm I will bring forth some other brain zones and touch on what has happened more obliquely and abstractly. Ergo, Sohbet time! When all else fails there is poetry.
[Editors’s note: ok yeah, so crashed again after this update last fall and abandoned all hope of poetry (the height of tragedy!). I am just now moving past the I can’t even… and starting to put words to what has happened. So please be patient while I push through everything from mental exhaustion (typos) to emotional confusion (meandering thought trains with questionable destinations).]
[Editor’s additional note: Damn that was a long note — see what I mean about undirected thought trains.]