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stillness

Ask Me if I am a Tree

Hey I'm a tree“Ask me if I am a tree…” in my teen years this was my best friend’s favourite riddle. The answer is: “no.”

Yeah… I still don’t get it either; but when you’re hopped up on slurpies and skittles things are funny even if you don’t know why. Questionable humour aside, this may be my new prayer to self centering. But I’ll get to that in a minute.

I don’t know when or how I lost that sense of connection and groundedness I used to have, but I know when I really started to notice it. This summer started a game I have come to call: Pass the Crazy. Everyone in my sphere has been going through some flavour of crazy-making stress, or doing some fine self-generated crazy for internal reasons, or some combination thereof. Including myself, as per being flooded out of my home. Traditionally how things work with my friends is a trading of support, when you’re in the crazy tree you reach out to somebody on the ground. Trouble was, NOBODY was on the ground. It was really just a matter of who was on a lower branch of the crazy tree. So there we sat, just passing the crazy from one branch to another.

I found being a support to whoever was most crazy when I was feeling my least crazy was frustrating and exhausting,Read More »Ask Me if I am a Tree

Poetry as a Metric

image One of the sticks I use to measure just how excellent I am being to myself is how often I compose in my head (and jot down!) little bits of poetry. Getting it together to actually post here as a Sohbet is A+ gold-star life management.

What poetry actually measures for me is life-saturation of moments of stillness, time with a bit of quiet in my head. If you’ve been following me on twitter or paying any attention here, you’ll know there hasn’t been much coming out of me creatively. This is probably the most stressed I’ve ever been in my life (six hundred fifty one bad sectors on my hard drive was just the capper – I’m thumb-typing this whole post on my phone – twitch).

I had a lovely moment of stillness last week – before the cold, wet Autumn weather hit. I got to sit by a pond, enjoy the amber leaves and smile at the duck feeding in front of me. For the first time in weeks a wee little haiku stirred in my brain, which I subsequently forgot as I didn’t write it down.Read More »Poetry as a Metric

10 minutes’ll do ya!

So, my latest health adventure is my adrenals seem to be coming back online – though in fits and starts. Mostly this means I get the adrenal rush of fight or flight response out of nowhere. An ohmyGodohmyGodohmyGod alert for no bloody reason which leaves me wound up beyond belief.

My acupuncturist has given me some homework to help alleviate this energy crashing at the gate of vitality or whatever he called it after sticking twenty needles in my ass. Read More »10 minutes’ll do ya!